Raising Gentlemen and Ladies (Full Version)

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peculiar_lady2 -> Raising Gentlemen and Ladies (11/4/2009 11:56:18 PM)

OK...so my oldest two are in the elementary school age group...10yo son (Jake) and 8yo daughter (Hannah). (Emma is 4yo and right on the edge of this age group). They have grown past the little kid stages and we are on into developing appropriate attitudes and such in regard to others. We have always tried to lay the foundation of treating others the way you want to be treated, but I think it's time to step it up a bit. I see a bit of selfishness creeping in with the way the treat each other sometimes, and I really don't like it. I deal with it when it comes up, but I really want to hit a few more things and wanted to talk about it with others that have kids in this age group.

So....is chivalry dead in your household? If not what do you do to teach your children (boys and girls) about accepting and giving of yourself to others, and the appropriate types of attitudes they need to have towards their siblings and towards those of the opposite sex?


(Little background...I am married, however my hubby is in the Army and is in Korea for the next year..well, 9 months now. So while I do agree that boys and girls need to learn some things from parents of the opposite sex or of the same sex, I kind of have to step in right now to do both. So please keep that in mind).



charity7 -> RE: Raising Gentlemen and Ladies (11/5/2009 7:55:59 AM)

Well I have always set forth an example of doing for others--when mine were younger we would bake cookies and give them to elderly or single parents, we visited a nursing home one time a month and I had them make tray cards for the nursing home for different holidays, I make home made bread and everytime I make bread we give away a loaf-I let the kids pick a neighbor --everytime we heard someone needed help moving, or raking, or cleaning a basement---I would just volunteer my boys and we went and worked together-I would just tell them this person needs help we have the time we will help them----sometimes they complained but I just set the standard of helping others when they were younger it just grew to bigger stuff as they grew! I taught them that they should put God first , others second self last.[sm=heart.gif]



Ellie-Mae -> RE: Raising Gentlemen and Ladies (11/5/2009 10:05:57 AM)

We are addressing some those same issues at our house too. Right now we are memorizing 1 Thessalonians 5:11-15. It is a wonderful passage! My two eldest both admitted (separately) that they desired to live in peace... to have peace and unity with the whole family. I was amazed that they would bring that up. So I started looking up scripture about peace and unity and came upon 1 Thessalonians 5:11-15. I was so thrilled, and so are the kids! Take a look at it!



Tinkerbell_ -> RE: Raising Gentlemen and Ladies (11/5/2009 10:19:48 AM)

The boys went through a phase where this happened and we went through I Corinthians 13 and discussed brotherly love and why it's so important to love your brother.

They wrote essays about it and everything and so far that has helped. Occasionally when they squabble I sing softly, "Brotherly looooove." and they back off and work things out.

As for true chivalry it's hard because my father is not chivalrous at all and in fact things I'm "ridiculous" for teaching it to the boys, so I'm pretty much on my own on that. They are getting better and the other day Thing 2 actually held the door open instead of letting it fly back and smack me in the face. [:D]



peculiar_lady2 -> RE: Raising Gentlemen and Ladies (11/5/2009 11:05:57 AM)

LOVE that one Lisa...thanks.....

1 Thessalonians 5:11-15 (King James Version)

11Wherefore comfort yourselves together, and edify one another, even as also ye do.

12And we beseech you, brethren, to know them which labour among you, and are over you in the Lord, and admonish you;

13And to esteem them very highly in love for their work's sake. And be at peace among yourselves.

14Now we exhort you, brethren, warn them that are unruly, comfort the feeble minded, support the weak, be patient toward all men.

15See that none render evil for evil unto any man; but ever follow that which is good, both among yourselves, and to all men.


quote:

As for true chivalry it's hard because my father is not chivalrous at all and in fact things I'm "ridiculous" for teaching it to the boys, so I'm pretty much on my own on that.

What's ridiculous is that they would think that to be a bad character. I grew up in the south and hubby grew up in California, so we have totally different outlooks on "chivalry". So I am sure that doesn't help sometimes.



charity7 -> RE: Raising Gentlemen and Ladies (11/5/2009 11:14:36 AM)

I forgot to say that one of our rules was that our boys had to do 1 nice thing a day for someone else in the house it could not be the same person every day and it was done in secret! Such as, make some one elses bed when they were not looking--also at Christmas they each had to wriite a not to each other person in the house and put them in each others stocking-it had to be something positive-[sm=heart.gif]



peculiar_lady2 -> RE: Raising Gentlemen and Ladies (11/5/2009 11:16:47 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: charity7

I forgot to say that one of our rules was that our boys had to do 1 nice thing a day for someone else in the house it could not be the same person every day and it was done in secret! Such as, make some one elses bed when they were not looking--also at Christmas they each had to wriite a not to each other person in the house and put them in each others stocking-it had to be something positive-[sm=heart.gif]

[:D][:D]I like those ideas



Ellie-Mae -> RE: Raising Gentlemen and Ladies (11/5/2009 11:25:35 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: peculiar_lady2

LOVE that one Lisa...thanks.....

1 Thessalonians 5:11-15 (King James Version)

11Wherefore comfort yourselves together, and edify one another, even as also ye do.

12And we beseech you, brethren, to know them which labour among you, and are over you in the Lord, and admonish you;

13And to esteem them very highly in love for their work's sake. And be at peace among yourselves.

14Now we exhort you, brethren, warn them that are unruly, comfort the feeble minded, support the weak, be patient toward all men.

15See that none render evil for evil unto any man; but ever follow that which is good, both among yourselves, and to all men.



See why I was so excited?? [:D] I am having the kids memorize it in NKJV. It is the first time that I have used anything other than KJV for memorization, but I think that the wording is just a little easier and will stick with them better throughout the day.



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