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RE: Online Dating - 10/28/2009 10:36:43 AM
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herestoresmysoul
Posts: 1453
Joined: 3/13/2009
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quote:
ORIGINAL: WhiteRoseBlessings
That's absolutely wonderful! 
. . . But, it's not for me.
I, too, have experienced an online relationship.
It really isn't my cup of tea.
Taking the person with whom I had this relationship completely out of the picture, I still have some reasons as to why I don't particularly care for online relationships. If anyone is interested in hearing them, I'll be happy to share them here in this thread.
I've been in relationships from both sides of the spectrum; I've been able to "compare" various nuances and so forth. And from that, I've been able to realize what works best for me.
As far as what other people do in their own lives, that's completely up to them.
It sort of may depend on whether you have a choice. At the age that I was when I met my husband on line, I was 47,and believe me I didint know a single available christian man of between the ages of 35 and 65. Not a lot of choice then for women of that sort of age. If you know single people of near your age and can meet someone locally thats great, but for me it was stay single or go online.
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RE: Online Dating - 10/28/2009 11:19:32 AM
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WhiteRoseBlessings
Posts: 18174
Joined: 4/11/2005
From: Here . . . but subject to change; stay tuned
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For me, the quantity of "available men" doesn't have anything to do with meeting "the one".
Incidentally, I'll be 46 next month . . . and I meet people all the time; and some of them are even single Christian adult men. 
Also, there was a 21-year period from my divorce to my first husband, to my marriage to my second husband (who is now deceased). In that timeframe . . . about 10 years after my divorce . . . I dated one man for about 4-6 months. I met my late husband about 7 years after that. Taking that even further, my late husband and I knew each other for 5 months before we went on our first date . . . and during those 5 months, we got to know each other extremely well; I cherish those 5 months. And, to take this even further, we dated for 2 years before we married.
I prayed for patience once, back in my early 20s. 
LOL
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
For what it's worth, I don't have any animosity or negative feelings towards people who do online dating. Truly, I don't.
I simply responded to a thread in which the OP asked people their opinion on a certain subject. I gave mine.
. . . and now, I need to go meet a client; y'all be blessed.
HIS Peace and HIS Joy,
Sharon-Marie
_____________________________
❖ Let's Discuss the Advent Season ❖
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RE: Online Dating - 10/28/2009 1:10:12 PM
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herestoresmysoul
Posts: 1453
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Hmmm but for me it wasnt the 'quantity',it was that there werent ANY. Also I had 6 years between my divorce and meeting my second husband., so plently of time to realise that I hadnt actually met even ONE in all those years. So for me it was a question of either meeting a non Christian(not an option for me) or staying alone, or widening my horizons on the internet. Funnily enough my husband is actually Australian( I live in the UK), but he has lived here for many years.He also only lived about 30 miles away but I would never have met him otherwise.
You are blessed if you have met any single Christian men of anywhere near your age as it is rare when you get to middle age.(well it is here in the UK anyway)lol
Even if you go on line the numbers of women to men are about 4 to one,at my age, and as men tend to go for younger women that makes the number disparity even greater. So I do feel so blessed to have met such a good and godly man.
By the way my son. aged 31, has met his lovely Christian girlfriend on an internet site also,(they will marry next year) and she is truly lovely.everything that I could have wanted for him and more, so for me the internet is a success.
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RE: Online Dating - 10/29/2009 11:32:04 PM
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teacher1982
Posts: 190
Joined: 10/11/2009
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I, for one, am giving up. I've been on eHarmony and Match.com and SingleC.com for two years and haven't met one decent man. I have met about six men that needed to be buried, revamped, saved, or something! But no one nice enough to introduce to the kids, and that's my first priority, if you know what I mean.
So as soon as my memberships run out, I'm not renewing them. I am 61, tall, attractive, average size (not at all overweight), a classy dresser, a Christian, not a gold digger, don't ask for a fancy life, and am willing to overlook the un-handsome for a good Christian man who is honest and sincere and faithful. I don't think they make them anyone. If they do, they are all still married.
Guess I'll just have to get used to being alone the rest of my life - which I definitely do NOT want to do. Guess the stats are against me.
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RE: Online Dating - 10/30/2009 5:44:59 AM
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herestoresmysoul
Posts: 1453
Joined: 3/13/2009
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quote:
ORIGINAL: teacher1982
I, for one, am giving up. I've been on eHarmony and Match.com and SingleC.com for two years and haven't met one decent man. I have met about six men that needed to be buried, revamped, saved, or something! But no one nice enough to introduce to the kids, and that's my first priority, if you know what I mean.
So as soon as my memberships run out, I'm not renewing them. I am 61, tall, attractive, average size (not at all overweight), a classy dresser, a Christian, not a gold digger, don't ask for a fancy life, and am willing to overlook the un-handsome for a good Christian man who is honest and sincere and faithful. I don't think they make them anyone. If they do, they are all still married.
Guess I'll just have to get used to being alone the rest of my life - which I definitely do NOT want to do. Guess the stats are against me.
teacher, the funny thing was that I had actually 'given up' just before I met my husband. I had been on different sites for 2 years with no success. I came off one completely and decided that I would go back onto one that I had been on for a short time earlier just for the 10 day trial period and after that would give up. Well my husband had only just come on this site (his first one)during that trial period and that was that. if I had given up totally I would probably still be alone now.
I do understand though that as we get older the chances get slimmer.Even at the age I was then (late 40's )the number of Christian men were small and by the 60's they are even less compared to the number of women.
However God can and does work miracles.God Bless
< Message edited by herestoresmysoul -- 10/30/2009 5:51:00 AM >
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RE: Online Dating - 11/2/2009 6:19:19 AM
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herestoresmysoul
Posts: 1453
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baabaasheep
Congratulations.
I also decided after 2 years of being on dating sites that I wasnt going to contact anyone without a photo, but yes, you guessed it, when I read my dh's profile I just KNEW that he was a very special man so did contact him. We have never looked back and have been married for 4 years this month. (a second marriage for both if us. GOD is so good)
< Message edited by herestoresmysoul -- 11/2/2009 8:45:10 AM >
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RE: Online Dating - 11/2/2009 6:23:36 AM
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herestoresmysoul
Posts: 1453
Joined: 3/13/2009
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Just wanted to say that only this weekend I have been in contact with a lady who was on the same Christian dating site as me years ago and guess what, she met her 'mr right' after 7 years of being on that site.
She is now happily married to a man who is being called to be a pastor. Like me they are middle aged, (although she told me that he is 6 years younger than her) Like my husband, he had only been on the site for a few days.
Good men never stay there long they are always snapped up, especially for the older age groups..
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RE: Online Dating - 11/2/2009 8:14:44 AM
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jhuperetes
Posts: 472
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Interesting. Both of you took a chance on picture-less profiles, and both of you have had a positive outcome.
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RE: Online Dating - 11/2/2009 8:44:56 AM
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herestoresmysoul
Posts: 1453
Joined: 3/13/2009
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quote:
ORIGINAL: jhuperetes
Interesting. Both of you took a chance on picture-less profiles, and both of you have had a positive outcome.
The strange thing is that dh did try to load a photo onto the site but it wouldnt let him,lol
I do think we need to be flexibe about what rules and restrictions we put on ourselves on these dating sites. I think many miss out becuase they have too many 'dos' and'donts' and 'shoulds' and 'oughts'. I am not saying that we should compromise on important things, but such things as "I will never ever contact anyone who doesnt have a photo" does rule out many people in one go.Anyway its good that I didnt stick to that at least.
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RE: Online Dating - 11/2/2009 9:02:36 AM
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teacher1982
Posts: 190
Joined: 10/11/2009
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I don't even read the profiles of men without pictures. Maybe I should, but I figure on-line dating is risky enough without talking to someone who won't even post a picture.
For those who have posted a picture, that is how I decide whether or not I want to contact him through a wink or email. If he is a foot shorter than I am, I don't contact him. If he isn't attractive to me - in my eyes, which is what we ALL do - I don't contact him. So to contact a person without a picture is like buying a pig in a poke, so to speak. (That's Tennessee-speak!)
Also, there have been a few times that I have been contacted by a man without a picture. I answer him back and ask for a picture. I get an email telling me how good looking he is and to trust him. NOT! It's easy to upload a picture or send one to my yahoo email account. If a man won't do that, I'm suspicious.
I believe I said earlier - I'm about to give up and accept that I will be alone the rest of my life unless God sends a man knocking on my door - which could happen if God wants it to. When my memberships run out, I'm not renewing. It's a waste of money. You have to remember that the ONLY way these on-line dating services make their money is to NOT match people up so they get us to renew and pay more out of hope.
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RE: Online Dating - 11/2/2009 9:59:10 AM
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Tinkerbell_
Posts: 8035
Joined: 1/25/2008
From: NeverNeverLand
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quote:
ORIGINAL: teacher1982
I don't even read the profiles of men without pictures. Maybe I should, but I figure on-line dating is risky enough without talking to someone who won't even post a picture.
For those who have posted a picture, that is how I decide whether or not I want to contact him through a wink or email. If he is a foot shorter than I am, I don't contact him. If he isn't attractive to me - in my eyes, which is what we ALL do - I don't contact him. So to contact a person without a picture is like buying a pig in a poke, so to speak. (That's Tennessee-speak!)
Also, there have been a few times that I have been contacted by a man without a picture. I answer him back and ask for a picture. I get an email telling me how good looking he is and to trust him. NOT! It's easy to upload a picture or send one to my yahoo email account. If a man won't do that, I'm suspicious.
I believe I said earlier - I'm about to give up and accept that I will be alone the rest of my life unless God sends a man knocking on my door - which could happen if God wants it to. When my memberships run out, I'm not renewing. It's a waste of money. You have to remember that the ONLY way these on-line dating services make their money is to NOT match people up so they get us to renew and pay more out of hope.
I think what I bolded is why I don't like online sites. I don't date people I'm attracted to.  Sounds weird I know, but I'm not a visual person. I don't have to be physically attracted to date someone. Nor am I physically attractive so if someone were to see my picture he wouldn't be interested.
_____________________________
When I've shown you that I just don't care
When I'm throwing punches in the air
When I'm broken down and I can't stand
Will you be strong enough to be my man?
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on a free christian dating site of all places..It's strange how u can shell out bucks to these paid sites and hardly find anyone yet on the entirely free sites u can find the man/woman of your dreams. (Teacher1982) you could try christiandatingforfree.com, just to see what happens there seem to be some really good folks on there.