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RE: Who would join me in prayer and fasting ?? - 10/19/2009 9:36:14 AM
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TheEgyptianPrincess
Posts: 127
Joined: 8/3/2007
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a report from the weekend...
so Sunday morning my husband wakes up early and prepares to go to the Coptic Orthodox church... he of course knows am not too excited about it... but I keep quite... then he says he will take the boyz with him, I tell him that Andrew really enjoys Sunday school and it would be a shame if he misses it. He asks Andrew if he wants to go with him or Sunday school with me.. Andrew pics Sunday school. So then Philly says he will take the younger boy and then will catch up with me at my church later on. I sigh but don't say much, but then Andrew was like noo I want my brother to come with us...and Philly says... well I want mum to come with me (as in go with him to the orthodox church). At that point I stop and I look at Phil and ask him, ok.. do you really want me to go there? He says, well I am supposed to be the head and you are suppose to follow me... so I take a deep breath and I tell him that if that is what he really wants, then I would go with him. And I have to say, I was not sure how I was going to handle the response or my actions... so I kind of started to tear up a little, but tried hard not to show it. Then he tells me no, he doesn't want to force me to go there cause he knows my heart is not in it, and that he just wished we would go there as a family. I don't reply...but just kept quit and gave him a hug and carried on getting ready.
As we were leaving, he tells me he would meet me at my church at around 11:30... I kind of get upset since the service starts at 11... but I say.. ok fine.. do whatever you want...
me and andrew are on our way to church in the car when my phone rings... it was Phil... he doesn't know if the orthodox church was finished or they moved?! I have to admit.. my heart leaped for JOY... I was like.. so now what? so he goes... I guess I will see you there in 10 -15 mins... that means he would come to sunday school and ALSO the service (sunday school is at 10 for both c children and adult and then service at 11)
He came and sat next to me.. and actually participated with questions and answers and stuff...then when services started... (forgot to mention - he actually wore a suite and tie and the whole show that morning which he KNOWS I love ).. we had a few visitors and stuff.. so he leans over to me and tells me that he was going to stand at the back next to the door to be an usher and help people find seats. (NO ONE had asked him to do this!!)
we go out to lunch with the pastor and his wife - nice food, nice conversation.
Then evening service, before we leave the house.. he asks me...should I wear the tie again or loose it? I was like.. I think you should wear it (the pastor has been requesting the few guys to wear ties to church so they could be used as ushers etc)....he says.. no I should loose it.. i say.. ok do whatever you like... he continues to give me reasons why he should loose it AS he was putting it on?.. after he was done with it.. I told him how handsome he looked.
At church that night I was on nursery, we were watching a movie that night, but before it we had testimonies time... Now remember I was already at the back with the kids .. so I wasn't there at all to hear anyone.
On the way home from church, he tells me that he gave a testimony and I asked him what was it? he says that he told everyone that even though he went to another potter's house church in Australia (same fellowship - just my church in Australia), and even though it was much bigger than our current church, he missed this (baby church) and felt like this was more his church and that the revival we had a few weeks ago when we just came back from Australia... confirmed that for him?!... I was like WOOOOW... and then he goes even further and says to me, you know.. now in that new location, I would be into going to outreach (we go out on the streets on Saturday and just witness to people or hand out flyers in the neighboring houses) with pastor cause this in this new area there would be a bigger chance to invite people out! I was like WOW.. you should go for it.. tell pastor you would want to go with him on Saturday.. it would encourage him a lot.
ALL of this time.. I was praising God on the inside.. and to be honest... VERY VERY CONFUSED!.. oh.. an another thing.. when my son and I walked in church first thing in the morning without Philly... someone asked about him, and my son blurts out, he went to the other church with the priest.. the guy that asked and the pastor look at me.. and I explained..yes.. he went to go to the orthodox church, but it was closed.. so he is going to come now... Pastor was like.. WOW...
So what do you guys think?
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RE: Who would join me in prayer and fasting ?? - 10/19/2009 10:10:14 PM
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a_sparrow
Posts: 626
Joined: 6/20/2006
From: Los Angeles
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It sounds as if your husband is torn, but is deciding upon your church. Maybe God is calling him to attend there - ? In any event, that is an awesome report.
I am wondering if part of wanting to go to the Coptic church was about wanting to be the decision-maker, and whether once you agreed to follow him there, he saw, first, how unfair that would be to you, and after you and he had determined that you would attend your own service, how his attendance at the Coptic church would divide your family and confuse your children. And then perhaps the closed Coptic church sealed things for him.
_____________________________
Elizabeth
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RE: Who would join me in prayer and fasting ?? - 10/20/2009 9:14:41 AM
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TheEgyptianPrincess
Posts: 127
Joined: 8/3/2007
Status: online
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oh I know he is torn...but this is also not the first time he has asked me to go with him to the Coptic church...a few sundays he has gone there with the older boy and he is not bothered at all by a division.... But I do wonder, and knowing how my husband is, I don't think he will give up on the Coptic church. He may even go again next week earlier just to try and see... i pray pray pray that they have moved.. but I just highly doubt it... I just think that they finished earlier.
That is why I get so confused cause if you didn't know what happens at home... to anyone attending our church... he is very devoted to my church.... but to be honest, for me its not about being devoted to my church or something.. its being devoted to God and for His work and His truth and for raising our children in a christian home. KWIM??
Last night, his sister called and was saying how she and her husband want to come down for my birthday (early november), and then again for christmas, but that time would be also with his parents. This is a FIRST... we usually have to BEG them to come down.. and in all honesty... we (mainly I) don't push it nor do I do a lot of begging.... so them asking to come over is very odd and scares me.. as they are the main reason why Phil is so confused regarding the Cotpic church. After years of being against the coptic church, they are now going there regularly and encouraging him to go. I see my inlaws as the thorn in my side. They have an odd spirit about them and I just always feel uncomfortable being around them. I really don't want to spend my chirstmas like that....but .. how on earth do i tell my husband that I don't want his parents around... that is just plain rude!..and also, lets not forget, that he reminds me that I should be loving my enemies!!! I think Phil is about to make a break through in his spiritual walk, and having them around THAT often is the devil working against us.
Please pray for us.
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RE: Who would join me in prayer and fasting ?? - 10/27/2009 10:40:39 AM
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TheEgyptianPrincess
Posts: 127
Joined: 8/3/2007
Status: online
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Quick update on the weekend...
Hubby was sick and told me the saturday night that he was not sure if he would go to church the next day - I didn'tmake a fuss and just said not a problem. Next morning.. we all woke up earlier than usual.. gave the kids breakfast etc... then I casually asked him what his plans for the day were.. and he said he doesn't want to go to Sunday school (at 10am).. I said that is fine and that I would take the kids and go and he could just meet us there for the service (11am)... and he said yes.
There was no tug of war.. there was no mention of going to the orthodox church... he even came on time and all dressed up. Then sunday night we all went again together.. we were watching a video that night.. he bothered me a little cause he was playing on his phone (his new toy).. I asked him several times to put it down.. he wouldn't.. and kept telling me to be quite cause he can't hear me.. the video and surf the web all at the same time!.. I was MAD... GRRR.. I "jokingly" told him that next time I would take his phone off him before the service started. I then realized that he may now be doing it just to prove a point to me... so i decided to be quite and just let him do whatever he wanted... but I have to say.. on the inside iwas MAD MAD MAD.... but sure enough.. after a few mins.. he put the phone away !...
He uses his phone now at church even for reading the bible.. I hate it... I like the old fashined way... he is too techy... and I think its a distraction - as it was that night with surfing the web while "listening" to the preaching....
All in all, it was a GOOD sunday....I am learning so much through this.. and that is.. TO BE QUITE!.. sometimes I want my husband to act the way I want him to act.. but then he just does the opposite to defy me.. I need to remind myself constantly.. that God is in control.. and that my husband is NOT my child! (though I have to admit.. I always tell people I have 3 kids.. 2 I gave birth to and 1 I married.. which now that I realize it.. I think is very bad)
This is hard on me! But praise God for everything.
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RE: Who would join me in prayer and fasting ?? - 10/27/2009 11:06:28 AM
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peculiar_lady2
Posts: 4826
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quote:
There was no tug of war.. there was no mention of going to the orthodox church... he even came on time and all dressed up. 
quote:
He uses his phone now at church even for reading the bible.. I hate it... I like the old fashined way... he is too techy... and I think its a distraction - as it was that night with surfing the web while "listening" to the preaching.... My brother brings his laptop instead of his Bible. He takes notes on it during the sermon, and his pastor even turns to him to ask him to look something up quickly for him sometimes. It's a large church, and my brother stands out as a geek, but hey, it keeps him seated and listening, and he gets something out of it. (My brother does not have a diagnosis of Aspergers, but seriously, if you read a description of it, it is HIM).
quote:
All in all, it was a GOOD sunday....I am learning so much through this.. and that is.. TO BE QUITE!..
lol. Just remember, you are his wife, not his mother. He doesn't need you to be his mother...so don't "mother" him. He is a big boy and can make his own decisions...and I see that you are letting him. When you stop treating him like a child he doesn't act like one!!
quote:
I always tell people I have 3 kids.. 2 I gave birth to and 1 I married.. which now that I realize it.. I think is very bad)
Yeah, sometimes "jokes" show the deep down hurts in us.
_____________________________
Proud to be...  
The LAW presses from the outside to conform. GRACE calls to the inside to change.
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RE: Who would join me in prayer and fasting ?? - 10/27/2009 3:00:47 PM
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TheEgyptianPrincess
Posts: 127
Joined: 8/3/2007
Status: online
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I have been speaking to him today and trying to make him feel better... he had gone on an interview a few weeks ago, and the client likes him and wants to bring him on.. but the whole background check and stuff like that is causing issue (apparently an undisclosed issue about driving with a suspended license which resulted in an over night arrest -GRRR)..its been 3 weeks now... and still nothing.. he was telling me today how he is angry at G od.. and even bitter.. I tried to explain to him that God's timing is not our timing.. but it just made him more mad..I told him how God was able to raise the dead after 3 days.. his response was.. well its been TWO YEARS....he feels he is cursed... and NOTHING I say makes him feel any better... and at times it makes him mad cause I am the one working and he is not... he says that even when he does get a job he will still be mad at God cause it has taken so long.. (he has been out of work for like 7 month... but going through issues for 2 years now)...
I told him he needs to pray.. and break whatever curse he has on his life.. he said he never wants to pray cause he feels God is just enjoying watching him suffer.
I am at a loss of what to say or do to encourage him through this trial. I am learning I need to pray more. I need God to open the door for my husband to surrender
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RE: Who would join me in prayer and fasting ?? - 10/28/2009 12:43:03 AM
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a_sparrow
Posts: 626
Joined: 6/20/2006
From: Los Angeles
Status: offline
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Is it possible that he is depressed? Two years of unemployment would be a major source of stress and self-doubt for most men.
I hope you know that as hard as it must be for you to watch your husband suffer through this, it is not your fault, and it's not something you can work through for him. In supporting him, encouraging him, and praying for him, you're doing all you can.
_____________________________
Elizabeth
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RE: Who would join me in prayer and fasting ?? - 10/28/2009 6:52:18 AM
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TheEgyptianPrincess
Posts: 127
Joined: 8/3/2007
Status: online
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no... he has been out of work for like 6 or 7 months....which is still a long time.. last year he was working in a job he absolutley hated and at the end they let him go.. which added salt to the wound as he was enduring it cause there was no other job. He is defenitly depressed and always says how he is a total looser. He did some investments 2 years ago which went down the drain BIG time and it cost us a lot of things....but for him.. many many MANY sleepless nights. so for him.. he feels like he has been going through t his trial for 2 years.
On the contrary though, the investment that he did and went really bad, could have had a worse affect on us as a family, but I believe God has used this whole economic downturn in order to "lessen" the effect on us... and that keeps me going and trusting... that even though its the worst thing that my husband could have done... God is able to turn it around and make it something good for us. But ofcourse my husband being a man... and the cause of this majour loss... and the lack of work while I go to work and get promoted... is the worst thing ever.
I know its not my fault, but I can't feel bad for him and attempt to try to fix things for him :(
Keep praying for us please.
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RE: Who would join me in prayer and fasting ?? - 10/30/2009 8:17:44 AM
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TheEgyptianPrincess
Posts: 127
Joined: 8/3/2007
Status: online
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yes please do. We had a majour disagreement and he returned to cigarettes. Please pray for this addiction to be broken. I feel that it is so unfair that anytime he is mad with me.. he uses that as a way to get back at me... of course he does not say that.. he says its cause I stress him out. I don't know how to be a christian wife at all when he smokes. Things usually just get worse between us.
I am really sad and heart broken today.
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RE: Who would join me in prayer and fasting ?? - 10/30/2009 8:44:14 AM
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TheEgyptianPrincess
Posts: 127
Joined: 8/3/2007
Status: online
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he just msged me and told me he threw the smokes out.. I am happy... but also still sad. When will he ever be set free from this habbit? This is an area I struggle with a lot - to the point where I don't k now how to pray for him - I hate to admit it... I sometimes think and SAY not very nice things at all...
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RE: Who would join me in prayer and fasting ?? - 11/3/2009 10:00:23 AM
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TheEgyptianPrincess
Posts: 127
Joined: 8/3/2007
Status: online
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Report from the weekend
I think I forgot to tell you guys that my husband got a job Praise God!.. They called him Thursday in the afternoon and asked him to start on Friday. So, he has been a working man for 2 days now!!
The weekend was fine also... Although Saturday night he told me he was going to wake up early and call the Priest from the orthodox church to find out what happened? If they changed location or the time has changed for the Mass. I just said aha - ok and left it at that. Sunday morning, he wakes up nice and early (the whole daylight savings thing)... Oh.. I forgot to mention , that Saturday night, the pastor from my church sms'ed all the men from church (like 3 of them), saying they were going to have men's breakfast at 9am on Sunday morning before Sunday school. So Sunday morning when he wakes up.. I asked him if he is going to go to the men's breakfast... So he kind of pauses and asks me "should I go?"..so I was like... Yeah.. Why not!... The he goes.. "Yeah might as well.. And I will take Andrew with me also" (our older son).. I tell him he doesn’t have to and he can just go alone and enjoy himself, but he says that even the time he went before alone, the pastor had told him he could bring Andrew with him (he is only 4 years old)... So.. They both went.. And he even stayed for Sunday school.. And I went later to Sunday school and took my little one with me. The day was nice and peaceful... I had a bad headache after church so I went to bed and he looked after the 2 boys.. And then for Sunday night we all went again - with no putting up a fight - or saying.. "Do we have to go AGAIIIINNN???"...actually.. My older son has now been saying that.. He usually has a nap Sunday afternoon before we go back to the evening service.. So when I am waking him up I tell him.. Wakeup sweet we are going to church...and he usually grumble says.. But we went already!!!...I usually try and tell him yeah but we are going again so we could see pastor and his wife and their son (their son is a teenager who my son adores).. That usually gets him going.
Anyways... So all has been good!.. But I do need to ask you for extra prayer this coming weekend. My sister is law and her husband have kind of invited themselves over to our house (they live in Boston with my in-laws) cause they want to celebrate my birthday... (which is odd cause they don't even talk to me or acknowledge my existence most of the time).. And the worst part is, my in-laws have not committed to saying yes they will also be coming for the whole weekend or not... So I am on edge...
I don't want their orthodox influence to cause my husband to take a steps backwards....I don't want that spirit on our house or on our family.... Please pray that we have dominion.. And maybe even have a Godly influence on THEM instead of the other way around. I have to admit, I am secretly praying that my in-laws don't come.. My SIL and her husband are not as against me as the in-laws.. So I can kind of put up with it for 3 days much better.
Please continue to pray.
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RE: Who would join me in prayer and fasting ?? - 11/10/2009 10:26:48 AM
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TheEgyptianPrincess
Posts: 127
Joined: 8/3/2007
Status: online
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Update from the weekend...
Well, my SIL and her husband came down for the weekend, and I was anxious on the kind of effect this visit would have on my husband... I was kind of away (in and out) during the weekend cause I worked Saturday morning and then had errands to run in the afternoon... So I was worried as they were all going to be left alone with him for a big chunk of the weekend...
Sunday morning we all woke up earlier than usual, and we all sat down and had breakfast and talked.. Then it was nearly 10 o'clock so I told my husband that I would go take Andrew to Sunday school and that they could all meet me at church at 11 for the.. He asked me to stay so we could all hang out, but I reminded him how much Andrew likes Sunday school and its only once a week. So he let me go.. As I was leaving I was worried they would not come, or even be late... But there was really nothing I could do about it.. But as I was about to leave.. I heard my husband tell his sister and the husband that they should start getting ready since they still had the baby to get ready and stuff so as not to be late! I have to say.. I was SHOCKED to hear him say that!!!.. I just smiled at him and left.
Also at the end of the service we usually have the alter call (for anyone to get saved) and then after that the pastor allows people to go up the front at the alter and kneel and pray.. Kind of to seal in the word of God if the sermon ministered to you... And lo and behold..my husband...my sil and her husband, they all went up the front to pray (not for salvation) and seal in the word of God. I guess they were touched (the sermon was about trusting God)....
We all went out for lunch and then they left back for Boston around 4... Phil , then kids and I went to the evening service, and I was on nursery . I didn't know that they were showing a sermon on video... So anyways.... While in nursery I sent my husband an sms (thinking he wouldn't see it then since he would be watching the sermon) since I was bored... And he responded .. But nothing to do with my original sms.. All he said was, the sermon is really really good and that I should take it and watch it at home. At that point I was convicted.. I shouldn't have sent him an sms, and should just let him concentrate on the preaching. And on the way home, he was telling me how good the sermon was, and proceeded to tell me what the preaching was about.... I have to tell you.. I was in shock!.. I was more convicted cause if he hadn't even told me what the sermon was about, I probably wouldn't have asked.
I was talking to my mum yesterday and telling her how the weekend was (she knew about our visitors) only to find out that she had prayed and fasted for me the whole last week!!!! And I did the same on Thursday.. So wow.. God really did move this weekend.. I pray that my husband be completely transformed and used for God!!
I am happy ;-) thank you to all who prayed, and please continue to pray!
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RE: Who would join me in prayer and fasting ?? - 11/30/2009 4:44:11 PM
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TheEgyptianPrincess
Posts: 127
Joined: 8/3/2007
Status: online
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Update.... this is going to be long since it’s a 2 week update
So nothing really different has been happening at church ..
2 Sundays ago my youngest son was not feeling well.. So Saturday night my husband and I spoke and we said that he would stay home with him Sunday morning, and I would stay with him Sunday night... That way we alternate going to church and still keep baby home.
So I took my older one to Sunday school(10am), and then midway during the song service in the actual morning service(11am), my husband walks in with our younger son... I look at him in shock and ask my husband "What happened?"... He tells me he is sorry he was late, but he was watching some soccer game... I tell him that I wasn't even expecting him as we had talked the night before about him staying home with the baby. He says "oopss I forgot about that!!".. So I was impressed at the fact that it was almost a habit for him to come to church... It made me feel that there is hope...
We had an awesome thanksgiving at our house with people from church.... Then on the Saturday night, my husband tells me that he will not be going to church Sunday morning cause he really really wants to watch this particular soccer game LIVE rather than just TIVO it... I think about this in my mind, and come to the conclusion that I should just let him do whatever he sees is right. So I take the older son to Sunday school and also service, then come home after church is all done. Husband tells me that he could really have gone to church cause the game didn't properly start till about 10 mins before I had walked in... I said that it was ok and dropped the subject. He asks me about who was at church and what the sermon was about... I had known that our pastor was not going to be at church that night cause he was going to be out of town and preaching in another church. And we were going to watch a video... My husband asks me well who will be opening up the church and stuff(my husband has a church key and has opened the church in the pastor's absence before).. I tell him that a couple of the other guys will be there with the key and stuff. He then tells me that he won't go to church that night cause he doesn't like it when its just a movie. A HUGE part of me had already decided that I wasn't going to push him about going to Sunday night service cause I didn't even want to go!!!! I am usually on nursery Sunday night (only my son is in nursery anyways)... So.. If I am going to be looking after him at church.. I might as well stay home with him..... So we decide that we will just not go... I actually ended up going to the mall to get something done before the week started.
Today I tell my husband that I feel so bad for not going last night... He tells me not to feel bad cause lately he has not been too excited about going to that church and about the pastor (a few things happened last week...our pastor is an ex cop and very American... Owns a gun and talks about it freely at church or at fellowships.. My husband does not think its appropriate to talk about this so freely infront of new converts at church - which I agree with him.. A second incident is for thanksgiving, the pastor's wife baked the pies... And well.. They brought the pumpkin pie with a missing slice!.. My husband was shocked and told me that no matter how simple and how red neck the pastor may be... Some things are just not right....)
He reminds me that it is important for our children to grow up in a place with our culture's ways not just being a Christian..
The Egyptian culture would be a lot more conservative.. More ambitious... More blah blah blah... I tell him that I am not really so keen on the Egyptian culture.. So he questions me , why did I marry an Egyptian then??
I did agree with my husband about our kids needing to have some of our culture taught to them... Also the fact that our kids are the only kids at this church.. And that apart from us, and the pastor and his wife.. There are no other couples....he tells me that being a Christian is good but fellowship is also important.. I again agree with my husband... He tells me that he is really not wanting to go often anymore and that I should just continue to go cause this is *my* church and that most of the people that go there now, go cause of *ME*.. I tell him that no way do I want to have that responsibility... (he means in the social manner... I tend to call people and follow-up and have more fellowships at my house ALL the time - more so than the pastor and his wife)...
Then I remembered all the advice that I have gotten here, so I throw this comment out at my husband... Would you be interested in looking at another Pentecostal church in our area??.. He tells me yes and no.. But the church that he would rather go to and stick to is the Coptic Orthodox church... ...
I tell him that that would be such a hard thing for me to do and that I would be very uncomfortable to go there.. He reminds me how he has been sacrificing for the past 5 years and going to my church even though he would rather be going to the orthodox church....
This conversation was over the phone while at work and we had to end it short cause he had a meeting...
But here I am.. Left so confused and don't know what to do... Do I follow him into the orthodox church and call it a day... Do I look for another Pentecostal church (he is against the Pentecostal movement cause hates the many denominations of it.. The orthodox is apparently the oldest church and the one that withstood all church splits).....but even if he was to agree on a Pentecostal church.. How do we even go about finding one for us? I am very much against church shopping!!!...do I go to the orthodox church and pray that God convicts my husband OUT of going to that church? But what kind of bondage am I putting on my kids? .. And I will be out numbered in terms of beliefs...how could I pray for my husband to turn away from his religious way to a more Christian way.. When I would be in the midst of it?
I am so confused and my heart is really heavy!
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RE: Who would join me in prayer and fasting ?? - 11/30/2009 6:03:16 PM
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peculiar_lady2
Posts: 4826
Status: offline
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Well, it seems that he has said that he didn't like one aspect of that church...that it is YOUR church. So maybe point out to him that you are will to compromise on some aspects of the pentecostal stuff, but that you would feel out of place in HIS church and that maybe these feelings with both of you about that church is a way of God pushing you to come together as a couple and find a church that is not yours and not his, but can "belong" to both of you. Since he has brought that up, I think he will be able to see the validity in that "argument".
quote:
but even if he was to agree on a Pentecostal church.. How do we even go about finding one for us? I am very much against church shopping!!!
check out the phone book...call places, or find internet sites, and request church information packets. They usually contain the basic church beliefs, then you two can read them over and pray about them together. You might be able to eliminate a lot that way, then when you get to the point of visiting churches, I would suggest not going on sunday mornings. You get a much better feel for the church when you go to other services. I understand that you don't want to "shop around", but unfortunately sometimes it takes a little bit of visiting to find a church that truly fits you.
Also, don't get caught in "thats not a 'pentecostal' denomination so we will eliminate it" trap. I know you are most comfortable there, but your hubby isn't quite to that point yet. Also some denomination churches don't necessarily follow the beliefs of that denomination the same as others. As I said earlier about my hubby, for several years God led us to a baptist church because hubby needed the basics...he wasn't ready for the deeper stuff yet. They did a good job of doing that for him. We have also been to Baptists churches that believed in the indwelling of the Holy Spirit and were much more on the pentecostal side of things.
I would start with a list...three things each of you are will to compromise on, and three things each of you are stuck on. Then pray over your list together, and get to calling and requesting info packets.
_____________________________
Proud to be...
The LAW presses from the outside to conform. GRACE calls to the inside to change.
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RE: Who would join me in prayer and fasting ?? - 12/1/2009 12:55:47 PM
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TheEgyptianPrincess
Posts: 127
Joined: 8/3/2007
Status: online
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its not so much such pentecoastl... he is anti anything that is NOT Coptic Orthodox.. cause he believes its the original church and the only church that has never been shaken through out the time. He is also giving me the.. I was against going to your church but I sacrificed and came just for you.. so why can't you sacrifice and come to the Orthodox church for me (DH).... how do I respond to that? it is true.. he has been going to my church for ME and only me...
this is a really hard time in my life...I am afraid it will come to us going to the Orthodox church and then staying there forever and my kids grow up with that kind of teaching...
also my 5 year old already understands the difference and it will affect him since he really REALLY loves our pastor and everyone at the church..
We would not be allowed to take comminion in the Orthodox church since we have broken 1 of the church sacrements (we married Pentecoastl ...which to the Orthodox is the same as us living in sin).. and I KNOW they will force me to have my kids water baptized Orthodox....
This is just so much... I think i am not going to bring this up again and just wait and see what happens....
Please please pray for me... I am even at a point where I have to motivate MYSELF to go to my church... and I think its the devil trying to discourage ME... its like.. fine.. if her husband won't stop her... then maybe I could discourage her personally...
ARGHHH!! I am so confused
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RE: Who would join me in prayer and fasting ?? - 12/7/2009 9:21:37 PM
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a_sparrow
Posts: 626
Joined: 6/20/2006
From: Los Angeles
Status: offline
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It sounds as if your husband is confused - he seems to know he isn't living in sin, yet wants to attend a church that teaches that he is. I can certainly understand why you would feel unable to attend a church that doesn't recognize your marriage and with which you and your husband would be out of fellowship for the rest of your lives.
Even though your husband is adamant about wanting to attend the Coptic Church, is it possible that if you did what Peculiar Lady suggested and collected information about various local churches, your husband might be interested? Some Baptist churches are very good. In light of your husband's background, I'm wondering whether a highly liturgical church with sound theology, perhaps a conservative Episcopal church, might also be worth trying.
_____________________________
Elizabeth
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RE: Who would join me in prayer and fasting ?? - 12/9/2009 4:23:13 PM
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TheEgyptianPrincess
Posts: 127
Joined: 8/3/2007
Status: online
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yeah... I am now much more open to the idea of finding another church for us... this was something I would have never EVER EVER contimplated a few months ago.... I just pray that my husband does not force the whole orthodox church thing... he doesn't believe that everything they do is correct.. but he believes they are the closest thing to the truth... like he in no way would agree that our marriage is a sin...but he can understand why THEY would say that since we broke a church rule....
last night I got the mail.. I usually lay it down on the table and don't look at it till much later.. actually most of the time my husband will look at it when he gets home after me before I get a chance to look at it cause I would usually be busy with the kids and dinner and such.... well.. last night... I was moving it from one side of the table and I don't know what made me look into it.. but I went through it and found a letter addressed to him ... from the orthodox church! YIKES! see.. when he went to speak with the priest a long time ago, they added him on thier "mailing" list... I opened it.. and read it... turns out that the church DID actually move locations (remember I told you guys he went one sunday morning and it was closed?).. .. but they had the new address listed. They were collecting money for the new building (which I dont have a problem with).. but I just didn't want the letter around with the new address... am sur eif my husband asked around he could find it.. but I didn't want him to find it if I had a c hance to get rid of it..
so... I ripped the letter to tiny tiny pieces.. and threw it at the BOTTOM of our rubbish bin! was I bad for doing that? I dunno.. I don't feel guilty.. I feel like I am protecting us from a battle...
we have had revival this week at church.. started sunday morning (so sunday morning, sunday night and then every night till thursday)... my hubby and I have been going every single service...yesterday.. he even met me there.. cause he went there straight from work! I was so shocked!!!.. tonight .. I am not so sure I even want to go... cause (this is going to make some of you feel yucky).. I have not bathed the kids since saturday night)...and I feel like they need to be washed.. and the older one also has homework tonight (he gets homework twice a week.. and doing it monday just before we left for church and feeding them both dinner was crazy... and didn't bring out the best in me!)... soooooo... I guess I feel guilty for choosing NOT to go... and I know hubby won't go tonight if I don't go...btu I really won't push it.... does it mean I am letting down my guard or standards?... I will defenitly make an effort to attend thursday night service... especially cause the preacher is really awesome...
on a last note.. I have not been fasting at all :-(
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RE: Who would join me in prayer and fasting ?? - 12/10/2009 11:10:02 AM
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TheEgyptianPrincess
Posts: 127
Joined: 8/3/2007
Status: online
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LOL... am glad I didn't gross you out then!LOL
unfortunetly my kids have the kind of hair that NEEDS to be washed for it to look half way decent.... its the Egyptian in them that has them blessed with Afro-puff hair! LOL
So last night... my hubby went to church without me! LOOOL.. he didn't realize that I was defenitly staying home... he thought that I was just thinking about staying home!! so he gets to church and can't find me so he sms's me...he was like.. man... this is not fair..
he went to church straight from work!
He kept on sms'ing me.. and I was responding back at the start cause he didn't know where I was.. but then I told him he needs to be listening to the preaching (he claims he was listening and also msging me!! I hate that!).. so i told him i won't respond anymore.. and I didn't.. and he stopped msging me!...
all in all I was impressed that he went.. even if it was by accident... tonight is the last nigth of revival.. I am defenitly going.. and am sure he will make an effort!
I am so proud of him going to church.. I just wish he would pay attention and take the word to heart!
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RE: Who would join me in prayer and fasting ?? - 12/15/2009 4:05:17 PM
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TheEgyptianPrincess
Posts: 127
Joined: 8/3/2007
Status: online
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This is really strange...I spoke to a lady from our church last night.. and really opened up my heart to her about issues that I have been seeing at church... I have never done that before cause I feel that it is gossip...but .. I have been so confused lately ... there has been a couple of incidents where the pastor's wife and I (and in turn the pastor also) have butted heads... and 99.9% of the time.. it is always me who ends up being labeled in thwe wrong....
after last sunday's head butt incident.. I have noticed that the pastor nor his wife.. are really talking to me or my husband.. infact.. my husband had told me that a while ago, but I dissmissed it and told him it was his imagination...
also having spoken with that lady from church, she told me things that have happened which my husband was "observing" and telling me.. and me.. of course.. disagreeing with him.. and siding with the pastor and his wife....
now I am realizing that I am not even growing spiritually myself.. how do I expect my husband to grow...my husband last night repeated that our days are numbered at that church....
in all honesty, I don't mind... but I am petrefied, cause my husband is adament about us attenting the Coptic Orthodox church... and to be honest, I would rather be in a dead pentecoastl church, than an Orthodox church...
I am praying that God will soften my husband's heart towards finding another home church "together".... I have tried to suggest what Sarah has told me.. but he is just not open to it... he keeps giving me the "I sacrificed for you all of those past years, why can't you do it for me?" *sighs*
this is really hard.
I have never ever left my church body before... I have been part of this fellowship since I was 14 years old... The fellowship in Australia is amazing.. even my husband noted the difference. Please pray that God would direct our way to a church where we can ALL grow spiritually. I am feeling so dead inside....
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RE: Who would join me in prayer and fasting ?? - 1/6/2010 11:25:58 PM
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TheEgyptianPrincess
Posts: 127
Joined: 8/3/2007
Status: online
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If anyone is up and reading this... I need you to lift up my husband in prayer right now .. Tonight is the coptic orthodox christmas and he went to the coptic church for the mass... he texted me saying how there are 300 people at the church and that they hadn't started communion yet... which he really wants to get....and want to stay back till the mass is all finished to speak with the priest!! my heart is very very heavy... please pray that God opens my husbands heart and eyes to the REAL truth.. and for God to set him from from religious bondage.
I am very very sad right now and can't or don't even know what to pray....
please please pray
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RE: Who would join me in prayer and fasting ?? - 1/7/2010 11:08:34 AM
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TheEgyptianPrincess
Posts: 127
Joined: 8/3/2007
Status: online
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Praise God, he came home last night without taking communion nor staying back and speaking with the priest... but.. he tells me today that from now on he will be going to the orthodox church and taking the two boys with him.. and he is allowing me to go to my church if I want. He says he saw everyone there last night as families and kids were all together.... he says that church is more than just good preaching.. but about families and fellowships... and that's why we stopped going to the Time Square church in NY cause even though it had awesome preaching.. it was just tooooo big and we had no fellowship.....anyways... I asked him if we could look for a different pentecoastal church but he refuses to and that as he attended a church he didn't like with me for 5 years.. I should return the favour..
I am in a tough sitiuation right now... since I KNOW my church is not the best place for us as a family right now....but I also know that if we step foot in the Orthodox church we will be stuck there forever and just become religious and I don't want that for my kids!
What do I do???
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