|
Users viewing this topic:
none
|
|
Login  | |
|
Why did the chicken cross the road? - 10/22/2008 1:42:50 PM
|
|
|
manda59
Posts: 6158
Joined: 9/22/2005
From: Hampshire, UK
Status: offline
|
Didn't know where to put this, so that it didn't get lost! So here it is!
(I don't know how half these people are, but my American friend who posted it found it very funny, so I thought y'all might!)
Why did the chicken cross the road?
BARACK OBAMA: The chicken crossed the road because it was time for change !
The chicken wanted change !
JOHN McCAIN: My friends, that chicken crossed the road because he recognized
the need to engage in cooperation and dialogue with all the chickens on the
other side of the road.
HILLARY CLINTON: When I was First Lady, I personally helped that little
chicken to cross the road.. This experience makes me uniquely qualified to
ensure right from Day One that every chicken in this country gets the chance it
deserves to cross the road. But then, this really isn't about me.
SARAH PALIN: As a Mayor and Governor of Alaska I have fought against and
stopped the good ol' boy chickens attempts to cross the road against God's will.
It appears I have not fully succeeded. Where's my gun?
DICK CHENEY: Where's my gun?
GEORGE W. BUSH: We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road. We
just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road, or not. The
chicken is either against us, or for us. There is no middle ground here.
COLIN POWELL: Now to the left of the screen, you can clearly see the satellite
image of the chicken crossing the road with what is certainly weapons of mass
destruction, perhaps nuclear. We must bomb the chicken before it attacks us
and destroys our American way of life!
BILL CLINTON: I did not cross the road with that chicken. What is your
definition of chicken?
AL GORE: I invented the chicken.
JOHN KERRY: Although I voted to let the chicken cross the road, I am now
against it! It was the wrong road to cross, and I was misled about the
chicken's intentions. I am not for it now, and will remain against it.
AL SHARPTON: Why are all the chickens white? We need some black chickens.
DR. PHIL: The problem we have here is that this chicken won't realize that he
must first deal with the problem on this side of the road before it goes after
the problem on the other side of the road. What we need to do is help him
realize how stupid he's acting by not ta king on his current problems before
adding new problems..
OPRAH: Well, I understand that the chicken is having problems, which is why he
wants to cross this road so bad. So instead of having the chicken learn from his
mistakes and take falls, which is a part of life, I'm going to give this chicken
a car so that he can just drive across the road and not live his life like the
rest of the chickens.
ANDERSON COOPER, CNN: We have reason to believe a chicken crossed the road,
but we have not yet been allowed to have access to the other side of the road to
verify the crossing.
BILL O'REILLY, FOX NEWS: Another left-wing pinko chicken has crossed the
road, probably looking for another government relocation handout. Get over it
buddy, as far as I'm concerned, you're on your own.
NANCY GRACE: That chicken crossed the road because he's guilty! You can see
it in his eyes and the way he walks.
PAT BUCHANAN: To steal the job of a decent, hardworking American.
MARTHA STEWART: No one called me to warn me which way that chicken was going.
I had a standing order at the Farmer's Market to sell my eggs when the price
dropped to a certain level. No little bird gave me any insider information.
DR SEUSS: Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Yes,
the chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed I've not been told.
ERNEST HEMINGWAY: To die in the rain, alone.
GRANDPA: In my day we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Somebody
told us the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough.
BARBARA WALTERS: Isn't that interesting? In a few moments, we will be
listening to the chicken tell, for the first time, the heart warming story of
how it experienced a serious case of molting, and went on to accomplish its
lifelong dream of crossing the road.
ARISTOTLE: It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.
JOHN LENNON: Imagine all the chickens in the world crossing roads together, in
peace.
BILL GATES: I have just released eChicken2009 , which will not only cross
roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your
checkbook. Internet Explorer is an integral part of eChicken2009 . This new
platform is much more stable and will never need to reboot.
ALBERT EINSTEIN: Did the chicken really cross the road, or did the road move
beneath the chicken?
COLONEL SANDERS: Did I miss one?
_____________________________
"I think Manda and I are on the same page"
crankius, January 2009
|
|
|
|
|
RE: Why did the chicken cross the road? - 10/22/2008 4:58:00 PM
|
|
|
PopsiLufsJesus
Posts: 5223
Joined: 5/6/2008
Status: offline
|
LOL!
_____________________________
"Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer."
~ Romans 12:12
|
|
|
|
|
RE: Why did the chicken cross the road? - 10/23/2008 11:30:36 PM
|
|
|
sunshine4God
Posts: 7337
Joined: 4/11/2005
From: Sterling Ct.
Status: offline
|
Lol,These are very funny
_____________________________
Matthew 5:16.
"Let your light so shine before men that they will see
your good deeds and glorify your Lord".
|
|
|
|
|
RE: Why did the chicken cross the road? - 10/24/2008 10:30:38 PM
|
|
|
flyboy2610
Posts: 142
Joined: 5/10/2005
Status: offline
|
He wanted to watch a man lay bricks.
_____________________________
If the women don't find you handsome, they should at least find you handy.
Red Green
If you're going to live like there's no hell..... you'd better be right.
|
|
|
|
|
RE: Why did the chicken cross the road? - 10/24/2008 10:43:24 PM
|
|
|
manhattan42
Posts: 58
Joined: 4/13/2005
Status: offline
|
Why did the Chicken cross the road?
Republican Answer: Because he was told to.
Democratic Answer: Because he was told NOT to.
Independent Answer: Undecided.
|
|
|
|
 New Messages |
 No New Messages |
 Hot Topic w/ New Messages |
 Hot Topic w/o New Messages |
 Locked w/ New Messages |
 Locked w/o New Messages |
|
 Post New Thread
Reply to Message
Post New Poll
Submit Vote
Delete My Own Post
Delete My Own Thread
Rate Posts |
|
|
Forum Tools
Printable Version
I may be weird, but this one cracked me up! 
