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Individual counseling - 11/4/2009 9:49:06 AM
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ppodmama
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Joined: 10/31/2008
From: Midwest
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I need some counseling to help me through a very rough time in our lives.
It's not marriage/divorce related, but there are some outside problems making me upset....is it a good idea to go to counseling alone, or should I bring my husband with so he can hear what is being said to me and maybe understand why I might need to do/say certain things?
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RE: Individual counseling - 11/4/2009 11:42:08 AM
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bolt.
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From: Canada
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No. Counselling for private issues is private, and you need to be yourself and relaxed and alone. If there is something he needs to know, it's for the best that you learn to be able to tell him what it, and to say it well.
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RE: Individual counseling - 11/4/2009 12:38:26 PM
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stamper_ben
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It sounds like what's bothering you is affecting your relationship with your husband. Talk with the counselor about it first, then see if they feel it might be beneficial to invite you husband to one or more of the sessions.
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We will be known as His by the love we show one another.
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RE: Individual counseling - 11/4/2009 12:45:39 PM
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herestoresmysoul
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I think it is totally up to you. if you want him there then ask him ot go, if you dont.then dont.There shoudnt be any 'private 'issues anyway in marriage but as I said its whatever is more comfortable for you.
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RE: Individual counseling - 11/4/2009 1:36:58 PM
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TXRedhead
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When I did counseling, my counselor actually said he preferred to speak to married couples as individuals. He said the women, more often than not, would end up answering for the men. We did 1 or 2 sessions together as a couple, and he did 1-2 sessions with my husband, but, otherwise, I was on my own.
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RE: Individual counseling - 11/4/2009 1:38:30 PM
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jhuperetes
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If I may also suggest you look for a Godly and professional counselor.
Too many times I have seen and heard from "counselors", specifically in churches who were clearly not qualified, even by the most generous standards.
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RE: Individual counseling - 11/4/2009 1:44:33 PM
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Grace-N-Mercy
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quote:
ORIGINAL: jhuperetes
If I may also suggest you look for a Godly and professional counselor.
Too many times I have seen and heard from "counselors", specifically in churches who were clearly not qualified, even by the most generous standards.
I agree. A professional Christian counselor would be ideal, and they are found even in the small towns.
When you go in for therapy, your counselor will ask you a lot of questions about your situation... what brought you in for counseling, your background, your goals. You will have plenty of time to ask questions. You and the counselor together decide if your husband needs to go with you. You may want to consider a Marriage & Family counselor who is trained to work with both individuals and with families. They are trained to see a "systems" perspective, meaning, how your concerns fit into your relationship with your husband. Social workers do the same. A mental health counselor will likely want to see you on your own.
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RE: Individual counseling - 11/4/2009 3:57:41 PM
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southserve
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I am currently in counseling also for matters that are not necessarily caused by the marriage, but do affect it. I mean, your personal psyche and state of mind go along way to maintaining a healthy marriage and family life. I go to counseling alone and it has actually worked to both my and my wife's advantage because I practice what I "learn" during my sessions. It has done WONDERS for me. It is not necessary to have a Christian counselor, but he/she MUST respect the fact that you are one. Mine is not Christian but understands my need to cling to the Cross and encourages my desire to get closer to Christ. Indeed, if your spouse is "needed" at some point, your counselor will suggest it.......
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"BE JOYFUL IN HOPE, PATIENT IN AFFLICTION, FAITHFUL IN PRAYER" Romans 12:12
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